• P r o c e s s F i l m •
• D e s c r i p t i o n •
This was a pretty big and detailed illustration to do, took me somewhere between 30-40 hours to finish. And there was a point when I was like “I’m going to see laces in my nightmares, laces everywhere”. I’m not sure if you see it for the first, but I actually drew not the pattern, but the holes the pattern leaves out! Because I knew I want black background, and I wanted the face to become a lace, and the background it kind of visible there, and gradually becomes less visible, and then the normal face. I don’t think it is what you see at first, because we got used to patterns and such, but try to look at it for a little longer, and see the reverse. See that the holes of the lace is where the face disappears, and the pattern is skincoloured, and actually the pattern is the skin itself, getting lost more and more into the dark.
I’m going to be honest here. Up till yesterday this was supposed to be the concept for the My Lady lyrics illustration. But then the cover song came, and I just really didn’t have any inspiration for the song, nor help with it, and no mood to do it at all. Then the lyrics of the song… I originally have these ideas for their lyrics is because of the mood of the song (or affected by the teaser), not because I read and know the lyrics. So before yesterday I checked the lyrics if there are some lines I can put along with the drawing.. but none of them fit. … So there have been signs that this drawing isn’t supposed to be a lyrics illustration, and I’m just trying to push them onto each other. Though the inspiration, the roots from where this drawing came from, is that song (and the teaser). But yesterday I gave up trying to join them forcefully, and just let it be alone the way it wants. Looked for a song for itself, and I think I found one that perfectly matches and made a logo to it. I wanted a song thats classic, and something I can associate with nobility. Clean and elegant. But sad, melancholic… in the same time kind of .. strong, like .. there is hidden force in it, and that might sound a bit scary too. Like a high-class born, perfect mannered, cold person, with inner emotions, and a huge power that can be used if you threaten him, and you don’t stand a chance against him. That kind of music I was looking for. First I was checking waltzes and Bach. But they were too loud, too showing-off. And a prestigious person isn’t showing off. He doesn’t have to. … So I found it in this Adagio for Tron song. Which I like pretty much anyway, and was planning to use for … several other things, it’s a great composition, fits nearly anything thats “weird” and elegant (and the second half of the song fits anything that’s also “modern” beside these).
I think I have told already what I see in this picture : ) “Clean and elegant. But sad, melancholic… in the same time kind of .. strong, like .. there is hidden force in it, and that might sound a bit scary too. Like a high-class born, perfect mannered, cold person, with inner emotions, and a huge power that can be used if you threaten him, and you don’t stand a chance against him.” His eyes are quite strong. I don’t think they were this .. “cutting” on the reference picture. It somehow became like this on the drawing, with much strength.
But the romantic lace changes the direction of the force on the picture I think (I hope). Because of the lace the entire expression isn’t telling you a political fight, or something else he wants I don’t know what could be. No. Because of the lace everything is directed into a romantic way. Like a man’s story. In the dark, getting lost into the darkness, into the shadows. Beside his “high-class born, perfect mannered, cold person” having his everyday fight for existence, and to protect, there is that story, looking at you, disappearing. Everyone can explain it in their own way, I’m not telling my story, it doesn’t matter.
….. His lips are once again.. something I don’t feel sorry to spend 5 hours on. : P
In my opinion Kyungsoo fits to this image quite much. Well, okay, then again, I think he fits to any image quite much : D But now I mean his well-mannered way. His quiet personality. Saying only what he means. Quickly reacting to any situation change. The fastest (and basically the only) one to help out someone who needs it — did you notice how he quietly sings in when other memeber’s voice cracks a bit, like the last time I noticed it was in the Oven radio, when Yixing sang one of their song, and his voice went sliiightly off, and I suddenly noticed a really quiet voice in the back, and Yixing got back to the track, and the camera angle changed, and I saw Kyungsoo distancing himself from the microphone as if he didn’t have any connection with it. And he did this couple of times already, when I noticed. And I still remember when about a year ago they had one of their radio interview and one of the chinese member, I don’t remember which, had to read something in korean, and Kyungsoo was already paying attention without a blink, cause he knew what comes, he knew the person, he knew the situation, he basically had his breath hold in, just to be ready to help in any half of the second. Which does happened to be required, and he was the only one who reacted, and helped, reading out correctly in -20% volume, so only the one who needs can hear it, and it did help, while everyone else was just laughing on the situation, or entertaining themselves. Kyungsoo rarely laughs when the other members are making jokes out of an other member, in not quite a nice way.. it’s okay, no one is upset, and they are guys, they don’t take it serious, but still. Kyungsoo is like growing much in my eyes.
His caring towards the members is really wow, standing in the background, silent, with that little smile in the corner of his lips, without any blinking ( : D .. I was actually reading quite some about the psychology of blinking today in a book connected with film editing and cutting, things like when you blink, why you blink… and now I see it in another perspective : D … he doesnt blink – just so you know – because he holds the same thought for a long time, not changing it, he keeps thinking about it, he is holding that thought, or that emotion, steady. And that makes me assume that he is a really consistent, determined, steady, self-aware person, who feels and thinks through everything thoroughly. And once he came to a conclusion, he keeps it deep inside, and you better have something really strong argument against it if you want to change, or else just give up. This last ones for the longer term. But when in a certain situation you see him not blinking, he is still holding that same thought or emotion. And when he blinks, he changed it. When blinking fast he is having many thoughts together and still deciding which one has to remain (e.g. being asked about something, caught off-guard). Yeap. … … Or so they say. : D ).
I think he is one of the manliest among all the members. And in my view the most matured among the manly members. : D (like e.g. I think Kris and Chanyeol are also manly (.. and Jongdae.. maybe), but .. or might be only for the screen, I don’t know, naturally, I should know them in person to have such conclusions, but based on what I see .. .. they will be matured. In about ten years.)
So.. wow. The last time I wrote a personal description about Kyungsoo.. was quite some time ago. And he wasn’t my bias back then. And to be absolutely honest with you, I didn’t really know him back around that time. I was watching some live stuff with them, and I was forcing myself to only pay attention to him, because I really had no idea what kind of person he is, because I was looking at other members, blinded by them, and … I didn’t know who is Kyungsoo. Who he really is. So I was paying close attention to him for a while. Trying to figure out. Then I drew the Neverland Kyungsoo. And he caught me. That was when he caught me, when I payed attention to him. And noticed all those little stuff (like the helping with the korean language), I wouldn’t have noticed otherwise. But I was still on the beginning. Since then I got to know a lot more about him. And since then actually a lot of members have changed (like e.g. Jongdae.. … before the K and M joined their forces, he was completely different… my description was from that time. Now he is like .. not even close to that description. Or just a little. ) … Btw same goes for Baekhyun.. I was trying to pay attention to him before I drew him. But that was not quite successful, I still didn’t manage to figure him out, I explained it, that’s why he became the fog. But now … now that I got used to pay attention to him, and still managed to catch some things from him.. now I got to know him more and more, his cheerful, playful, always joking personality (but because of that farting story, he will never.. never ever become my bias. thats like… an ultra turn off, honey, sorry, you just shot out all your chances.)
So I’m glad I could write these now : D Pretty long though.
Ah, something else, I wanted to mention. Connected with Kyungsoo. When I drew his hands showing wolves, he did that only once before (though I think kris have been doing it the first…? not sure. someone else already begun doing it), then he was doing it nonstop. Then I drew Near Light, he did those binocular hands once before, on that chinese variety show. After that he kept doing it (and I love it still : D ). Then I made a conclusion like this now, in that time, and said that “now wear black more often, cause it goes with that red hair soooo much” (or sth like this). And I don’t think I have ever seen him wearing black that often (aah, when he was wearing that black coat *o*). NO. I’m not saying these are because of this, come on : D that would be ridiculous to think, even from me. But. I see a connection here… an absolutely accidental connection. So now I wish to say one more thing, and hope that this accidentally thing occurs again : ) … I dont want to see his tears again. First in the mv his eyes were red, and that was already really heartbreaking to see. His strong personality to be like that, even if it’s only acting. But then in the Oven Radio thing… he managed to make a tear. And he had tear falling down. He made it so fast. I don’t even want to know what he was thinking about that managed to make his heart break so fast.. … And after that he was all joking and “look”, and then the camera had a close-up on him, when the teardrop fell, and right when the teardrop fell, he still had that thought in his eyes! Did you notice it? It was still in his eyes for a moment. It was terrible. … I don’t want to see it again. Do you hear, honey? No more like that. Acting or whatever, just: no. Leave it to Zitao, he is better at it anyway : )
• T o o l s •
• pencils ( 5H to 8B ), black pastel
• 30-40 hours